My mouth hurts.....

I have toothache. Or, to be more accurate, I have pain in my mouth near my teeth.

I don’t actually think it is toothache per se. I’ve had that before, and it’s like having a hammer drill going at it in your mouth all the time and at double speed when you dare to move your head.

This, I think, is just an enormous ulcer at the back of my mouth where my embedded wisdom teeth leave a teensy gap between the gum and the fleshy part of my cheek. I’ve had a good gawp at it in a very bright light this morning (you know, in front of the mirror with a torch, pulling a sort of gurning competition face with my mouth stretched out) and that’s what it looks like, almost like some sort of giant, pulsating, slimy protuberance with a life of its own. Disgusting, isn’t it?

I have started to assault it with Corsodyl mouth wash (foul, but effective), a Corsodyl spray and some sort of industrial strength Bonjela type substance called Gingigel. Also rather foul, but something which in the past I have found effective.

I always do this for at least a fortnight before I even think of going to the dentist unless the pain is excruciating and preventing me living my life. I have a fear and hatred of visits to the dentist which is not equalled by my feelings about anything else associated with the normal routine of life. I have blogged before about my complete failure to see the need for six monthly or even annual checkups so long as you have good oral hygiene and don’t regularly crack your enamel on packets of rock hard pork scratchings. You don’t go to the doctors for a routine check up, so why the dentist? Just go when you have something wrong with you, for goodness sake.

The Hubby, who was brainwashed by his dentistry practising (and subsequently rich) ex sister in law, always goes along like a good little boy for his checkups and annual lecture from the hygienist. But it’s all to no avail; he has had more trouble with his teeth in the past five years than I have had in the whole of my five decades.

I am not afraid of needles, drills or anaesthetic. What I hate (really, really hate) is ‘things’ intruding into my mouth (ribald jokes now – come on, get them over with). I have a very strong gagging reflex, and just one little metal implement poking around my gums makes me retch. And as for those little square things they put into your cheeks to take x-rays , well, I’m outta there!

So I won’t be going to the dentist, at least not unless I really have to. My self help remedies from Boots have always worked so far, even if I have had to persist for a few days and run the risk of being a drooling slime monster when out in public as my mouth produces more saliva to cope with and try to counteract the alien presence growing within.

Increasing mouth ulcers and gum issues seem to be yet another thing which is increasing with my ‘certain age’. There is a definite link between when these things happen and other biological happenings, on a regular basis. And these are the things no one tells you about; yes, they tell you about hot flushes, mood swings, erratic monthly cycles etc, but not about an upset digestive system, aches and pains and dentistry difficulties.

I tell you, it’s a pain in the arse being a woman in her fifties – you blokes have it easy!

Head pain! Urgh!

The Hubby has been suffering badly with his teeth over the last few days. He has had chronic tooth ache in a tooth which had a root canal filling about 18 months ago. He went to the emergency dentist who told him that he had an infection and possibly a bit of the nerve was still there. The treatment 18 months ago cost about £300, so it's a bit bloody rich that he might now have to have more work done because the first lot wasn't properly completed.

I hate the dentist and I haven't been for quite some time. Even more, I hate the hygienist who pokes and prods, gives you a lecture then charges you a fortune for the privilege.

Any sort of pain in your head is awful, whether it be migraine, sinus pain or toothache. A few years ago I had to have a tooth taken out and the pain was excruciating. I have also suffered from blocked sinuses (quite regularly) before I had my rhinoplasty and spent days lying on a sofa trying not to move my head which felt like it had daggers driving into it. I am totally sympathetic to anyone suffering from any of these things which can incapacitate you for days.

So far, The Hubby is three days into a course of Amoxicillin and is getting through the paracetamol and ibuprofen like it is going out of fashion. But it does all seem to be calming down, and hopefully they will do the trick (Yesterday I thought he was going to expire as he looked so ill and was counting the minutes until the next dose!).

Inevitably, he will have to go back to the dentist and there will be more cost. It is ironic that he goes religiously for his check ups, sees the hygienist, flosses and uses a state of the art electric toothbrush and has had all this trouble whereas I never go to the dentist or the hygienist, don't floss and use an old fashioned manual toothbrush and my teeth seem to be fine (fingers crossed).

It's good job I'm OK and don't get anything serious (tempting fate writing that!). I can't take penicillin in any form, can't take erythramycin and medics always have to get their book out and scratch their heads when I need antibiotics. 

It would be good to get through 2012 without any more serious health issues. My knees are not right yet, nor is my back and I can see myself having back surgery within the next year, so I don't want anything else.

Keep your fingers crossed for me!