It's pointless....

I love Pointless !!

For the uninitiated, Pointless is shown on BBC One at 5.15 each weekday, preceding the news. The idea is that you have to provide an obscure answer to a question which as few others as possible knew. So the lower the points you get, the better. If you get an answer wrong, you get the maximum 100 points for that question.

It is absolutely staggering how little some people know. Last week, I heard a woman name Boris Johnson as a member of the Labour cabinet under Gordon Brown. But that's the same as any quiz show and of course it's much easier answering questions at home in my arm chair than it is doing it in the studio. But generally speaking, people are pretty thick.

One of the things I really love about Pointless! is the laconic style of Alexander Armstrong as the host. On most occasions, he couldn't look less interested in what is going on, and his almost completely but not quite hidden amusement when they give an obviously ridiculous or stupid answer is wonderful to behold. Equally great is Alexander's sidekick Richard, the clever man with the computer, who seems to know and be erudite about everything.

It's always very pleasing to be able to pitch my knowledge against the numbskulls who compete on these programmes and I have been known to score several pointless answers. Trouble is there is almost always a question at some stage about sport and that is where I fall down. I know nothing (that's zero, zilch, diddly squat and bugger all for the avoidance of doubt) about sport. Which is where you need a man, not a comment I find I make very often.

Judging by the standard of some of the contestants, I might as well enter my cats as a team; they'd do equally as well as some of the thickos I watch on a weekly basis. They'd only be able to answer questions about cat food, chundering up furballs onto the carpet, the best way to fur up the chairs and killing mice, but that gives them a greater breadth of knowledge than most contestants.

I've often thought about entering for one of these shows, but I just know I wouldn't have time. And I just know that for all my sneering, I probably would do just as badly as many of the people I am being sniffy about. But maybe one day I'll have to have a try, just to see if it is as easy as I think it ought to be!