Back to work today (briefly) before a few more days off. I'm really struggling to motivate myself, it all seems so DULL.
I'm sure the worthy residents of the wealthy central London borough where I work deserve to have their local authority open today, but actually it all does seem rather pointless. Most teams only have a skeleton staff available and things will just tick over. Nothing will actually get done.
I know lots of people feel really motivated and proud of their jobs, and indeed I used to feel like that. But more and more I can't really see the point of it all. After all, I'm not really making any difference to these people's lives and they are increasingly ungrateful and rude. It seems that the more we try to do for them, the more they expect and the less we get thanked. But perhaps I'm just feeling slightly jaundiced about the whole thing; I'm sure some of them think we are doing a good job and certainly if you work in the social services (for children, families, the elderly and the vulnerable) you really can improve and change people's situations. But planning, in Knightsbridge and Belgravia? Please! They're all filthy rich and most of them are foreign!
I've opened up my laptop today to 68 e-mails (not bad, but that's since 5pm last Friday), about half of which are rubbish, and half of the rest are whinges. I'm getting sick of it. Once, just once, it would be nice to open up an e-mail that says thank you.
I should be working now. Dealing with the problems and writing the reports no one wants too read. But I'm not, I'm writing this. The trouble is, jobwise I'm not sure what else I could do, and once you start to earn central London money, it's very difficult to move away from it because you take on commitments to match. I'll just have to make the best of it, won't I, and bide my time until I'm old enough to retire and do the things I really want to do. But by then I'll probably be too old and decrepit to do them!
So 2012 is a year of resolutions. I am shedding my commitments this year and focusing on ME! Weight, fitness and other general interests and leisure activities are coming first. That's my resolution! Let's see how long it lasts.
What you have to remember and keep in perspective is that life is happening NOW! This is it, we mustn't keep waitng for retirement or holiday or whatever, we must enjoy NOW!
ReplyDeleteIt is incredibly hard to do as we all sink back into the day to day living and stupid consumerism of things we don't really need and get uptight about trivia.
I'm not saying I can do it anymore than anyone else, I can't. But I do keep trying to remind myself,that i must be happy NOW!
You're right to focus on you and what you want, but work takes up alot of one's life, so you gotta be happy in it. I am now on half the salary I was, and do you know, I don't miss it, but by God am I glad I gave up that shit job it was killing me.
Bet you could manage on less and have much better quality of life. Be brave!
Ah but you are in a different financial situation from us. Virtually no mortgage, no maintenance payments and probably no other debts! I'm not really bleating - I have made my own choices - but it does get me down sometimes. And on top of all that there's all the issue with pensions which are a contractual right andf which will now cost loads more.
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