Oh the weather outside is frightful
But the fire is so delightful
And if you've no place to go
Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow!
And that's exactly what it's doing at the moment. Just a bit. Fat little flakes which are now starting to settle on the grass and pavements but (not yet) on the road. Nasty, wet, slushy muck which would be laughed at by tough alpine dwellers or those in countries where they get tons of the stuff every winter. Yes, its pretty when it's all white and sparkly, but what's the betting it causes chaos, even after the lessons of the last two winters when for a few days the country ground to a halt.
I hate the snow. I'm a Mediterranean beach person, most comfortable at about 90 degrees fahrenheit. I hate getting wet, I hate being cold, I hate not being able to get anywhere and I HATE not being able to go out in my trendy little soft top car safely. And when it snows here the road becomes impassable (it's steep, faces North and never gets gritted) so we have to leave the cars at the bottom and walk the last 500 yards. And this is suburbia, for Christ's sake, not some remote part of Northumbria.
I hate shivering on station platforms only to get into a train that is so overheated I have to strip off several layers of clothing and still feel like I'm in a sauna. I spend most of the winter looking like a sort of bag lady version of the Michelin Man.
Because I have a bad back and dodgy knees, I am terrified of falling on ice or snow, so spend most of my time shufflling around like some old biddy of 95. In fact I'm thinking of getting some prosthetic old lady features from the stage makeup shop and wearing them all winter so that people help me across the road and get up from their seats for me on the train (although that's a rare event these days!) and I can park in the disabled spaces at the supermarket (of which there are far too many).
I hope it stops soon. I have to go out tonight and if it's icy I don't like driving (I'm a bit conscious I'm sounding like a right wimp here, but just in case you haven't quite got the message yet, I DON'T LIKE SNOW) (or ice!). I was definitely born in the wrong country, wasn't I?
Roll on retirement. I'm going to sell up and move out to my house in Crete permanently. It snows there about once every ten years and even then it only lasts for about 24 hours then the sun comes out and its 20 degrees again. I'll clearly be much happier. But I expect I'd only find something else to moan about.
You're right, you are a wimp, and yes, we do laugh at you from our superior position atop the countries with the worst winters list. The problem with the UK is all the rain, not the snow. You can still go out when there is snow on the ground, properly attired, with warm boots that grip, but you're stuffed if it is raining. As for driving, get snow tyres. If you had more snow, the country would be able to justify more gritters and snow clearing equipment. We have blue skies, snow on the ground for 4 months, temperatures of -20C or less but NO RAIN! Give me that scenario anytime. Sorry about your knees and back though - poor old thing!
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